


I Need Your Strength

by maddiemcg23



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-24
Updated: 2018-04-24
Packaged: 2019-04-27 12:34:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 10,461
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14425512
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maddiemcg23/pseuds/maddiemcg23
Summary: you lose their breath every time they enter a room.your heart beats faster when they walk by.your skin tingles when you stand close enough to feel their breath.





	1. 1

-alec-

"why are we going to this party again?" i asked. izzy was always in the mood for a party.

i was waiting for about a half hour for her to finish getting ready. she came out in one of her usual party outfits: tight, sparkly dress with 5-inch heels, hair down.

"because. demons love parties. and this is one of the biggest parties in new york city." i rolled my eyes.

jace was already halfway out the door by the time izzy was done getting ready. he looked back at us as he walked down the front steps of the institute. "looking great, iz. let's get going."

"thanks, jace!" izzy said as she flipped her hair back behind her shoulders and grabbed her long, ankle-length coat.

"where is this party, anyways?" i asked my sister on our way to the party.

"it's at magnus bane's place. he throws parties all the time."

"the warlock?"

"yes, the warlock."

"i don't get downworlders. they're always partying. like the have nothing else to do with their lives."

"alec. life isn't all about killing demons. people actually like to have fun sometimes." she looked away. "not that you would know anything about that."

"excuse me?"

she stared at me like she knew i was hiding something.

i rolled my eyes again. "whatever. let's just get this thing over with."

she laughed and kept walking.

when we got to magnus' apartment, the place was filled with mundanes, downworlders, and demons. izzy started flirting with a shapeshifting demon and led him into one of the bedrooms. jace and i followed her, trying to be as discreet as possible. the demon shut and locked the door behind him, so jace had to draw an unlock rune on the door. he opened it a crack so he and i could see in the room. izzy took her jacket off and walked over to the demon, looking like she was about to kiss him. she walked back away and her snake bracelet slid off her arm, straightening into a whip. she swung her arm back, grabbing the demon's neck with her whip, and dragged him toward her. she stabbed him as he came closer to her, turning him into a sparkly orange, yellow, and red dust. his friends started filing in one after another. i grabbed my bow and an arrow out of my quiver, which both just appeared on my back, and shot it at a demon, resulting in the same thing that isabelle did. jace doing the same thing with his seraph blade to other demons.

after we finished, a man, a little bit shorter than me, came into the room. he was dressed in a silk patterned shirt, a black silk blazer, black silk pants, and black leather shoes. he was wearing gold, glittery eyeliner under his eyes. his black hair was spiked. he looked confused. "what's all the racket in h-" he stopped mid-sentence when he saw our weapons in our hands and our runes on our bodies. "shadowhunters. i should've guessed. thank you for not making a scene out there."

"no problem." i half smirked. i wasn't sure if i looked like i was smiling or not, but he couldn't take his glittery eyes off of me.

"and you are-?" jace asked him.

he immediately turned his gaze from me to jace, who was looking at him as if he was another demon. "magnus bane. high warlock of brooklyn. host of this fine party." isabelle smiled.

he looked at me again and smiled until he heard someone come into the apartment. he ran out of the room and stopped dead in his tracks when he saw who it was. a tall, blonde boy dressed sort of like magnus, just without the patterned shirt and the glitter eyeliner.

magnus started walking towards the boy slowly. once the boy started to talk, i realized that he was british. "hello magnus. lovely to see you again."

magnus looked really angry, as if he had a grudge on this guy. "jonathan morgenstern. i never thought i'd see you again."

the boy smiled, but it wasn't a genuine one, though. "i just thought i would stop by. it seems you never lost your love for parties." he looked around the room.

"you need to leave this party now."

"but i just got here. i can't leave yet."

"i said now, jonathan."

"my name is sebastian. not jonathan."

"LEAVE!!!" magnus screamed as he threw a red ball of fire at sebastian. the boy left so fast that i didn't even see him leave, and i don't think anyone else did either.

i couldn't stop looking at him and smiling. izzy was smirking. jace was staring at me as if i just killed a mundane in cold blood. i turned to look at him. i tossed my shoulders up, as if to say i don't know.

"let's go" jace said as he started pushing his way through the crowd.

on our way out, magnus yelled "NO ONE disturbs my parties!" i stopped and stared at him until jace dragged me out the door.

++

-jace-

back at the institute, alec and i were tracking demons while isabelle was in her room. after about an hour of looking on every single screen, i finally found something. "alec! izzy! i found some!" they both ran over to where i was standing.

"that's in brooklyn." izzy observed.

"thanks, iz. we never would've guessed." alec said sarcastically. izzy rolled her eyes.

"alright let's go. grab your weapons. hurry." i demanded. we all got our weapons and went to an apartment in brooklyn.

when we got there, i noticed there were some demons outside. "glamour yourselves and get ready." we all traced our invisibility runes and got our weapons ready. we finished in about a minute. record time.

"nice work boys." isabelle said, smiling.

we both nodded.

just then i looked around and saw a girl, couldn't be any older than 18, staring at us in disbelief. i looked at her, confused. isabelle's whip wrapped back around her wrist and alec and i put our weapons away.

"what the hell?" she nearly whispered. she locked her eyes on mine. the girl had long, orange-colored hair, and a sketchbook in her hand. there was a boy, probably her age, with brown hair and glasses, standing next to her, looking at her like she was insane.

mundanes, i thought. but if they were mundanes, then how could she see us?

"clary, what are you looking at?" the boy said, following her gaze and looking back at her. he obviously couldn't see us.

"simon, go inside. i'll be right in." she said,

motioning for the apartment where the demons were supposedly hiding in. "you guys just killed those people."

i ignored what she just said. "you can see us?"

"um...yes?"

"she has the sight, jace. how is this possible?" alec asked me.

"i have no idea."

"well, we don't have time for this. we have to go." izzy was desperate to leave. we walked to the other side of the apartment to finish off the rest of the demons.

++

-clary-

when i got inside, my mom and her boyfriend, luke, were sitting at the kitchen table, looking through a bunch of old pictures.

"hey mom! hey luke! simon and i were just about to go to the carnival. if that's okay."

"of course, sweetie! don't stay out too late!"

"we won't, i promise."

"alright. you two have fun!"

"thanks mom!" i said as i walked out the door, simon following me.

we went to the carnival and had some fried dough. we talked about the most popular comic books currently and about the latest video game releases. we also rode a couple rides.

there were people everywhere, but someone specific caught my eye: the blonde boy covered in tattoos who killed those people. he seemed to notice us because he walked over to us.

"hello clary." he looked at me and smiled a flirtatious smile. his hair was shiny and his eyes were locked on mine. they were a beautiful shiny gold, just like his hair. he had the cutest dimples i've ever seen. his eyes were extremely white and shiny.

he quickly looked over at simon and back to me. "mundane." he looked annoyed.

"hi." i smiled back at him. his eyes were glowing now and his smile grew bigger.

"who the hell are you?" simon asked him.

"no one you need to know." he rolled his eyes and looked back over at him.

"so then what the hell are you doing here?"

"i'm here to eat cotton candy and steal your girl." he had an evil smirk on his face. i tried really hard not to laugh.

"she's not my...we're just friends."

"best friends. we've known each other forever. since preschool." i looked at simon and smiled. just hearing that made me uncomfortable. i've only ever thought of him as my best friend and nothing more.

"right." he said, half-smiling. "come on, clary. let's go."

"excuse me? i don't know you."

"trust me. you want to."

i giggled and then rolled my eyes, trying to keep my cool.

"seriously. i don't know who you are. i can't go with you. i'm sorry."

"clary. what you saw earlier wasn't what you thought it was. now, i need you to come with me because you're extremely important. i need to figure out why you're so important."

i sighed. "okay fine. but simon is coming too."

he started to laugh. "no way. he can't come. mundanes aren't allowed in the institute."

"excuse me, but i am not a mundane, whatever that is." simon demanded.

he started to laugh again. "yes you are."

"simon. it's okay. just go home. i'll call you when i'm done."

"okay fine. but please be careful, clary. i still don't trust this guy."

"i will. thank you, simon." i said as i was walking away from him.

i left with the boy and he took me to an old, abandoned church in the middle of nowhere. "what is this place?" i asked him.

"this is called the institute. come on in." he led me inside and it was just like i imagined the inside of this place would look like: an old, abandoned church.

"a church?"

"wait a second." he said as he pulled out a wand-like object with patterns and shapes all over it and the end of it shined a bright white light. he traced a shape on the wall with the wand and then the church turned into a place with people and screens and tables and rooms everywhere.

then, the same people i saw earlier with him came up to us.

"what's she doing back here?" the boy asked the blonde boy who was with me. he looked and sounded annoyed.

"she has the sight, alec. we need to find out more about her." the blonde boy said. he took me to a bench somewhere in the institute and sat down next to me. the other two followed.

"okay. who are you people?" i asked them.

"i'm jace. this is alec and isabelle." he motioned to the two standing in front of us. "we're called shadowhunters. we kill demons and save downworlders."

"demons? downworlders?"

"yes. demons and downworlders."

"what are downworlders?"

"downworlders are vampires, werewolves, warlocks, faeries, djinns, and so on. they're half-demon and half-human. shadowhunters are half-angel and half-human."

"you're making absolutely no sense right now."

"okay. let me make it simple for you. all the stories are true. everything you thought was just fantasy is all real."

i was speechless.

jace got up to stand next to alec and isabelle sat down next to me.

"i know it's a lot to process. especially all in one day. but we're not gonna hurt you. we want to help you. oh and by the way, you can call me izzy." she smiled at me.

"thanks." i smiled back at her. i wasn't too amused, though. "so what's the sight?"

"it allows people like you to see the shadow world. apparently you have it. and i have no idea how or why." jace said, arms crossed.

"earlier, you called simon a mundane. what is that?"

"humans. like you and your friend." alec said to me for the first time.

jace looked over at alec. "she's not a mundane, alec. she has the sight."

alec said nothing and rolled his eyes.

"like i said. you are extremely important, clary. and we intend to find out a lot more about you." jace smirked.


	2. 2

-magnus-

izzy

magnus

hello isabelle. i just wanted to thank you for coming to my party the other day. oh, and i also would like to talk about one of the shadowhunters that was with you. the one with the blue eyes.

hey magnus. you're welcome. i love your parties! and alec? yeah he's my brother, why?

i appreciate that. i'm glad you love my parties. and yes. that one. i just wanted to know if he's single.

of course. and yeah he's single. would you like me to give you his number?

oh, i don't want to sound desperate. although, that would be lovely. thank you.

of course. his number is 731-2485.

thank you, isabelle. that is very kind of you.

you're very welcome, magnus.

++

-alec-

magnus

alexander

hello alexander.

who is this?

magnus bane. from the party? it was a pleasure to make your acquaintance.

oh. yeah i remember. you're the warlock, right?

yes i am.

how did you get my number, by the way?

i asked around.

izzy gave it to you, didn't she?

i'm not naming names.

of course she did. so what's up?

well i was just wondering if you wanted to come over for a drink.

um...sure. when?

how about right now?

uh...yeah. sure. i'll be right over.

alright. i'll be waiting for you.

++

-alec-

when i got to magnus' place, it was spotless. as if he never had that party the other day.

he came out of his bedroom wearing a glittery, patterned top that was half-open on his chest. he was wearing bright blue jeans, brown slip-on shoes, and about three necklaces, each one a different length. i noticed he had earrings on the top of his ears and black polish on his nails. his fingers were covered in silver rings. he was carrying a cocktail.

"hello alexander. thank you for coming." i smiled. he grabbed another drink from his bar and held it out to me. "drink?"

i grabbed it and took a sip. "thanks."

he nodded.

"so, why did you ask for me?"

"let me spell it out for you." he stepped a little bit closer to me. "i wanted to see you again."

"why?"

"why did you come?"

"i'm not sure."

"for almost a century, i've closed myself off to feeling anything for anyone-men or women." he hesitated. "you've unlocked something in me."

i was about to speak, when my phone rang, cutting me off. it was my mother. i talked to her for a second before returning my attention to magnus. "duty calls."

"ah. frold brow. maryse must be recruiting you for something...unseemly.

"um, listen magnus, i wish i could-i just-i don't know what i've done-" he put his finger to my mouth, cutting me off.

"i understand." he pulled it away and i smiled. he picked up his drink. "stay for just one more drink, and then decide." i smiled and nodded.

++

when i got back to the institute, izzy was working on something, until she noticed me walking in. "slept at magnus' place?

"we didn't do much sleeping." i walked right by her, but i still noticed the look on her face. "we just talked. that's it. oh, and i didn't ask you to give him my number, by the way."

"really? and i thought it'd be nice for you two to get to know each other better."

i rolled my eyes, and then i noticed her look. "what?"

she started walking toward me. "nothing. i believe you."

i sighed. "okay. magnus made cocktails. but i'm telling you, nothing else happened."

"when you're ready to talk about whatever you need to talk about, i'm here." she smiled and started to walk away. now i was annoyed.

"hey, i talk to you."

"about everything except your personal life. you know what? and it's not fair because i talk to you about mine all the time." i rolled my eyes. "seriously, alec."

"okay fine. i'm sorry, izzy."

"it's fine. thank you."

"you're welcome. now where are mom and dad?

"in mom's office. they're with jace." she led me to the office where they were all waiting for me.

"alec!" jace exclaimed when he saw me.

"alec, honey. there's something i have to tell you." my mother looked scared.

"what's going on?"

"the clace sent us back to warn you all that...valentine is alive."

"what??" i couldn't believe what i just heard.

"it's true, alec." jace said.

"how is this possible?"

my father finally spoke up. "we don't know. but this all started ever since you found that girl."

"clary has nothing to do with this." now izzy was mad.

"actually, she has everything to do with this. everything was fine before she got here."

++

-jace-

"why would you bring that mundane to the institute, anyways?" maryse was already yelling at jace.

"she's not a mundane. she has the sight. she's important."

"fine. try putting a rune on her and risk killing her."

i ran out of the room and immediately found clary in her room. when i walked in the room, she jumped off her bed. "hey. sorry i scared you." i noticed her sketchbook. it was covered in runes. she saw what i was looking at.

"that's my sketchbook."

"they're runes. how do you know about these?" i was still staring at it.

"what? they're just drawings."

"no. they're runes. they're extremely powerful and they're only for shadowhunters. lethal for mundanes." i hesitated. "give me your arm."

"what?"

"give me your arm. i need to draw something on you."

"will it hurt?"

"it'll sting only for a second. it's quick. trust me."

she held her arm out to me and i drew an enkeli on her arm with my stele. she winced. "that's it?"

"yes. you will get more over time. you need a stele and some training."

"what's a stele?"

"it's this." i held my stele out to her. "it activates the runes."

"if runes are lethal to humans, then how did i survive that?"

"i have no idea. is your mom a shadowhunter? or your father?"

"my father died before i was born and my mom isn't a shadowhunter." she hesitated. "that i know of." now she looked scared.

"at least one of them had to be a shadowhunter. did your mom ever say anything to you about this stele or about runes?"

"well, she does have tattoos like you do, but they look a lot more faded, though. i thought they were just tattoos, but...maybe they're runes." she paused. "oh my god. my mom has lied to me my entire life."

i put my hand on her shoulder. "hey. it's gonna be okay."

"no it's not, jace. my mother is a shadowhunter. or was. for 18 years, she lied to me about who she is. about who i am."

"clary. i understand. i'm here for you. i'll help you figure all this out." i couldn't take my eyes off of hers. it felt like she was drawing me to her.

izzy broke the silence. "hey guys!" she stopped and saw that clary was almost crying. "is everything okay? what's wrong?" she walked over to us.

clary looked up at her. "my mother lied to me. she's one of you guys. she's a shadowhunter. and she may have lied to me about my father, too. i have no idea."

alec walked in and izzy filled him in on everything.

"so then how can we get this information?" he asked us.

"i have an idea." i told him.

"no. that's too dangerous. they can kill her. and if they do, the clave will never forgive us for killing her."

"alec. she has to know how she became a shadowhunter. she'll be fine."

"jace is right, alec. she needs to know her past." izzy told him.

"then have her go back to her mom."

"fine. clary, i'll take you back to your apartment and you can ask your mom about all this." i said to her.

"okay. let's go now then."

++

-clary-

"mom?" my mother wasn't in her usual chair in the living room. the tv was off. something was up.

i looked all over the apartment. nothing.

i looked in her bedroom. she was sitting on her bed, staring at the wall.

"mom? are you okay?" i walked over to her. jace stood in the doorway.

she looked back at me. "clary? oh thank god you're okay." she hugged me.

"mom, we need to talk." i glanced back at jace and back to my mom. she was staring at him.

"who's this? a friend?"

"not exactly." she looked back at me.

"what's going on, clary?"

"mom, i need you to tell me something."

"tell you what?"

"the truth. about you and your past."

she sighed. "you know."

"did you think i'd never find out??" now i was pissed.

"clary-"

"no. you've had 18 years to explain all of this to me. about how you're a shadowhunter."

"what? how did you-"

i motioned back at jace.

"i'm so sorry, clary. but i did it for your own safety."

"my safety? okay now you sound insane. how the hell were you keeping me safe by lying to me my whole life?"

"because i was afraid this would happen." she looked at jace again. "you look so much like your father, jace wayland."

"how do you know me?" he asked her.

"i was good friends with your father back in the day." she sighed. "i'm very sorry for your loss. he was a good man."

"thank you."

she nodded.

"i can't believe you right now. we're leaving." i walked toward jace and stopped at the doorway. i looked back at her. "don't wait up for me." i said and left with jace.


	3. 3

-magnus-

izzy

magnus

so?? how was it??

it went great! thank you so much, isabelle.

of course!

he left pretty quickly in the morning, though.

magnus, i need to tell you something about alec.

sure. what is it?

look, i know my brother. he's sensitive. he gets hurt really easily. i just don't want anything to happen to him.

then we have that in common. isabelle, i understand that he's sensitive. he and i aren't that much different. look, i care about him. i really do. i just want you to know that i would never do anything to hurt him.

then fight for him and never give up on him. i just need you to promise me that.

i promise.

good. thank you.

of course, isabelle. thank you for helping me with your brother.

i'll do anything for him.

and as will i.

++

-jace-

"i'm sorry for all of that, jace. i was not expecting that at all."

"it's okay." i could feel her looking at me and i knew she was crying, but I couldn't look at her. not when she's like that.

"you didn't have to come with me, you know."

"i know. but i wanted to." now i was looking at her. "i wanted to hear what she had to say. also, you would've needed me if you saw a demon."

"you don't think I could've handled one on my own?"

"well, no offense, but you're not as experienced as i am." she rolled her eyes.

"well, thank you for coming. and you're right. i couldn't have done it without you. and i'm not just talking about the demons." i smiled. "seriously. you really helped me back there. if you weren't there, things would've gotten a lot worse. so thank you for being there, jace."

"i'm always gonna be here for you, clary." now i couldn't take my eyes off of her. i was still smiling at her. her eyes were sparkling. her face was pure. her lips were soft. her smile was stunning. she was just so beautiful. it took everything in me not to kiss her.

++

-clary-

he was so beautiful. his eyes were gorgeous. his naturally blonde hair was more scruffy and dirty now. i couldn't stop staring at him. his eyes were locked on mine. i took a deep breath and before i knew it, my eyes were on his lips. they were extremely alluring. it took everything in me not to kiss him.

i started to lean forward, and then my phone rang. i jumped back. "i'm...sorry. i..uh..i have to..you know..i have to take this. sorry." i walked aside and answered it. "hello?"

"clary? where are you? are you okay?" it was simon. he sounded worried.

"simon. hey. yeah i'm fine. i'm just with jace right now."

"seriously? that guy? i really don't trust him clary. pretty boys like him are always hiding something. you need to be careful with him."

"thanks for your concern, simon, but i'm fine. i can take care of myself."

"i know, clary, but i-"

"no. you don't. because if you did, then you wouldn't be saying that stuff about him. you don't even know him. he's actually a really nice guy. and he's actually helping me."

"clary-"

"simon. i know you're trying to help, but i really don't need it. i'm 18. i'm fine."

"clary. i'm sorry that i'm offending you, but you're my bestfriend and i'm worried about you."

"i know you are. i understand. and i appreciate that. but you don't need to protect me though. i can protect myself." i paused. "i'll call you later, simon." i hung up before he could say anything else.

i walked back over to jace. "hey i'm sorry about that. it was simon. he's way too protective over me. he acts like he owns me and i'm just tired of it."

"what? the mundane? he's the last person who should be saying that. you're 18. you're an adult. you can protect yourself. and he also shouldn't be making decisions for you."

"thank you. i keep trying to tell him that."

i kept staring at him. i couldn't take my eyes off of him. i started to lean in and backed away when i heard a car horn beeping. "we should probably get back to the institute."

"yeah. let's get back." he smirked.

isabelle was waiting for us when we got back to the institute. "jace! clary! how did it go? did she admit to being a shadowhunter?"

"yeah. she did." i looked like i just saw a murder.

"oh my god, clary! are you okay? what happened back there?"

"nothing. i'm fine."

"no you're not. what did she say to you?"

"she didn't say anything. just that she knew jace's father and that she's a shadowhunter."

"wait, she knew jace's father? how?"

"probably because she worked with him." jace stepped in.

there was an awkward silence until alec walked over to stand next to isabelle.

"you guys are back. everything go okay?" he was only looking at jace.

"well, we made it back alive, so that's gotta count for something."

"okay, so is she definitely a shadowhunter?" now he was looking at me.

"yeah. she is."

"great. so now what do we do?"

jace was looking at me, but not talking directly to me. "we train her."

alec looked shocked that jace would say such a thing. "what? we don't even know if she's ready. we don't even know if we can trust her, jace."

"alec. that's enough. let jace do what he wants with her." izzy said to him.

"why should i? she's a mundane."

"no i'm not. i'm a shadowhunter. and my mother just proved it."

"alec. she's one of us." jace said to him.

"fine. do whatever you want. i want nothing to do with her." alec walked away, not even acknowledging me.

"is he always like that?" i asked no one in particular.

"pretty much. alec normally just does what he wants." izzy was the one who answered me. "but don't worry. he'll come around eventually. i know he will."

++

-alec-

magnus

alec

hello, alexander.

hi.

how are you doing?

fine, thanks.

it was wonderful meeting you the other day. you seem...sympathetic. i would like to know more about you.

why do you wanna know more about me?

because i've been completely different ever since i met you. better.

why?

i don't know, alexander. you just bring out the best in me. i haven't had that in centuries.

so you want to know more about me because i make you better?

precisely.

uh...thanks...i guess.

thank you, alexander, for helping me be a better person.

yeah. sure.

++

-jace-

we were in the training room again now. she begged me to start right away.

"so, this simon kid. is he like your boyfriend or something?" i didn't know if i wanted to hear the answer.

"what? no. why do you ask?"

"oh. well, i'm no expert on mundane friendships, but he seems like he's in love with you."

"what?? no. he's not. why would you say that?"

"i mean, it's pretty obvious. he looks at you like you're the only girl in the world."

"seriously?"

"yeah. he's obsessed with you."

"you're just saying that because you're jealous."

i laughed. "yeah. sure."

"well why else would you be saying that?"

i smiled. "nevermind. let's just practice."

++

-magnus-

izzy

magnus

isabelle. i need your help with your brother.

hey magnus! sure. what do you need?

so, is he more of a flower man or a cologne man?

he's definitely more of a cologne man.

okay. and what's his favorite color?

cobalt blue. why do you ask?

oh, i have a surprise for alexander.

oh yay! what is it?

it's a surprise, so i can't tell you.

aw!

sorry. oh, and i have another question.

it's fine. and what is it?

your brother seems very masculine. should i lose the glitter?

oh no. definitely keep the glitter.

okay, good. i was hoping you would say that. thank you, isabelle.

of course! i'll always help you with alec!

and i appreciate that. thank you.

you're welcome!


	4. 4

-clary-

"you need to work on your movement. don't be scared. be confident." jace said to me as we were walking back to my bedroom.

i nodded. "i just wanted to apologize about my mom. if you don't feel comfortable talking about your family, then you don't have to. i understand."

"nephilim are taught that emotions cloud judgement. that's how i've lived my whole life. that's why i've never been comfortable talking about them."

"well it's okay if you want to talk about them to me, though. i just want you to know that."

"thank you, clary, but i can't. i'm sorry."

"yeah, sure. it's okay." i sighed.

there was a very long moment of silence that i wished had never happened. i could feel the tension in the air between us. i couldn't stand it. but jace spoke before i even had time to say anything.

"look, i should go. it's late and you need your sleep. we find out more about your mother tomorrow. goodnight, clary." he walked out so quickly and swiftly, i didn't even see him move.

"goodnight, jace." i whispered after him. and then he was gone. i couldn't believe i actually let him go. that was it. part of me wanted to go after him, but the other part thought it was better to let him go. give him some more time and space. let him talk whenever he's actually ready to talk to me. i just wished he would know that i'm here. i sighed and went to bed.

-alec-

it was a long drive to magnus' place. when i got there, i noticed that it was oddly quiet. he said he had a surprise for me and told me to meet him here. i knocked on the door, half expecting him not to answer. he opened it right away as if he was waiting by the door for me.

"hello alexander. nice to see you again. thanks for coming." he was wearing his normal purple, glittery outfit.

"yeah sure. so what's the surprise you had for me?"

"oh you'll see. drink?" he grabbed two pre-made cocktails from the bar and handed me one. he put his out to hit mine, but i pulled away.

"thanks, but i didn't come here to drink. you called me for a surprise. what is it?" i was getting annoyed.

he sighed in disappointment. "alright fine. you win. one moment." he left the room and came back with a blue scarf. i could tell that he just sprinkled some glitter on it.

"i don't wear scarves."

"i know. i just thought it looks nice with your eyes. and i hear it's also your favorite color."

"who told you that?" i hesitated. "izzy." of course.

he wrapped it around me. "beautiful." he said after he put it on me.

"thanks." i smiled. after about a minute, i realized that none of us has moved or said anything. thankfully, i broke the silence. "i should..probably...go."

"right. yeah. you should get back to your people."

"yeah. sorry. thanks again for the scarf."

"that's okay. and you're very welcome, alexander."

i walked out very hesitantly. i had a weird feeling that i should've stayed. that i wanted to. like i don't even know why i left. i stopped where i was, just outside of his apartment building, and thought about going back in. i really wanted to go back in, but i also had a job to do. so i went to my car and drove back to the institute.

++

when i got back to the institute, it was unusually calm. izzy came right up to me as soon as i walked through the door.

"hey! nice scarf. it matches your eyes." she smiled.

"thanks, iz. oh and thanks for telling magnus everything about me, by the way."

"alec, he was just trying to be nice. give him a chance. he really cares about you."

i didn't want to believe it, but she was right. anyone who works that hard to impress me must really care about me. especially if they go to izzy for advice about me. "izzy, i can't believe i'm saying this, but i think you're right. i'm going to his place tomorrow."

"good. I'm glad you finally agree with me on something."

"yeah, well don't get used to it." i smirked.

she rolled her eyes.

++

-jace-

i woke up exhausted because i couldn't sleep. i couldn't stop thinking about her. as shadowhunters, we're taught to control our emotions and not let them get in the way of our mission. but it's just something about her that makes me completely forget about that law.

the law is hard, but it is the law. that's something else we were taught. whether or not we want to follow it, it's the law. so we always have to follow it no matter what.

it's just something about her, though, that i can't get out of my head. i don't know what it is. i've never felt this way about anyone before. i don't know what to do about it.

i went into her room to see her changed and ready for the city of bones. i totally forgot about that.

"clary. you're ready." she turned to look at me. she gave me that look that she gave me when we first met. the look that made me forget about the law entirely.

"jace." she hesitated. "yeah. i'm ready. are you?"

"i have to change really quick. alec and izzy are coming, too."

"and simon." him. hearing that name felt like a hit to my chest.

"fine. him too."

i went back into my room and slipped on a t-shirt and jeans. when i got to the door, clary, simon, and alec we're waiting inside. i went straight up to alec. "where's izzy?"

"getting ready. you know how long she takes." he rolled his eyes.

"we're just going to the city of bones, not a party. how long does it take to get ready for a trip to see the silent brothers?"

"i don't know, man. ask her."

i rolled my eyes.

just then, we all heard heels running towards the door.

"damn, izzy. what took you so long? and also, could you please be a little quieter?"

"sorry."

"it's fine. let's go."

it took us a while to get to the bone city, and when we got there, it was about noon.

"alright. we should hurry up. the silent brothers don't like to wait." izzy said.

"izzy's right. let's go, clary. i'll come with you." i held out my hand for her to take. i could feel simon's jealous stare on me. i smirked without even looking at him.

"okay." clary said as she took my hand. when we got inside, she looked really scared.

"hey. are you okay?" i asked when we paused.

"yeah, i'm fine. what's that?" she pointed to a statue right in front of us.

"that's the angel raziel holding the mortal cup. it was his blood mixed with jonathan shadowhunter's that created our species. and that's our motto. 'looking better in black than the widows of our enemies since 1234.'" she looked at me like i was insane. i sighed. "fine. it says 'the descent into hell is easy.'"

"huh."

"yeah. okay let's go."

we kept walking in the city of bones to find the silent brothers waiting for us. they must've known we were coming somehow.

"okay. let's just get this over with." i said.

++

-magnus-

i couldn't get alexander out of my head. i can't do anything without thinking of him. i just didn't know if i should be the first one to call. maybe he would, but it's been several days since we last saw each other. we just spoke yesterday, but it wasn't much, though.

it's just so hard to see if alexander is even interested. i mean, i couldn't fathom why he wouldn't be. but i guess i am a lot to get used to, especially for him.

i felt like i had to make the first move, so i called him, hoping he wouldn't answer so i could just leave a voicemail.

"hello?"

"alexander! hello. i'm sorry, i honestly didn't expect you to pick up."

"well, i did, so what's up?"

"oh. i was just wondering if you wanted to go out for a drink sometime. you know, just you and me. and no one interrupting. i just feel like we haven't had the best time to take in a minute for ourselves and appreciate what we have."

"um...sure. that sounds fun. when?"

"how about right now?"

"you know, now's not really a good time for me. another time. gotta go." he hung up immediately.

playing hard to get. i love a challenge.

++

-alec-

when i got off the phone, everyone from the meeting was staring at me. izzy gave me a look.

"was that magnus?" izzy asked. she looked way too excited.

"yeah, why?"

she tilted her head at me. i knew what she was thinking.

"iz. i don't have a crush on magnus."

"okay fine. if that's what you wanna tell yourself."

"what's that supposed to mean?"

"oh nothing."

"izzy."

"when you're done pretending you're someone you're not, let me know."

"what do you mean?"

"you know what i mean, alec."

"i don't know what you're talking about."

"you will." she said as she turned away from me and back to our mother, who looked extremely mad at me.

i walked out of the meeting and into my room. i started to research more on different kinds of demons, but i couldn't get magnus out of my head. i thought about what izzy said. she was right. i can't explain what i feel, but it's definitely nothing i've ever felt before and i can't deny it, no matter how hard i try. i called magnus back. he answered right away.

"alexander! to what do i owe this incredible pleasure?"

"magnus. i would love to grab a drink with you sometime. is tomorrow okay?"

"yes! of course! i'll pick you up?"

"sure. that'd be great."

"perfect! then it's a date!"

"it's a date." i hung up.


	5. 5

magnus picked me up from the institute at about 6. he was dressed in a cobalt blue suit and he was covered in glitter, including his eyeliner. i could see a portal behind him.

"okay so where are we going? italy? france? marrakech?" i asked him.

"wherever you want, alexander. where would you like to go?"

"anywhere other than here. clary hasn't been here very long and she's already more trouble than she's worth. and jace is way too obsessed with her that he's lost sight of us. especially me. his parabatai. i just really need to get away from here."

"alright, alexander. i'll surprise you."

"okay."

we went through the portal and when we got out, i immediately recognized the city.

paris.

"woah."

"yes, alexander?"

"i've never been to paris before."

"and how do you like it?"

"it's beautiful."

i was speechless.

"i know. the view is pretty incredible, isn't it?"

i felt his gaze on me. then i realized that he hadn't taken his eyes off of me ever since we got here. i looked over and knew he was talking about me. he was smiling. i've never seen a smile like that. his eyes were glowing and i could see his dimples. i couldn't help but smile back. i blushed.

he broke the silence. "so, i know of a great restaurant right down the road here." he pointed to a very fancy restaurant that was called l'abeille. it looked huge from the outside. it was completely white with black pillars on the outside all around the building. it had a beautiful view of the eiffel tower.

as we headed down the gravel road, i started thinking more and more about what izzy said. i can't pretend to be someone i'm not. i was in paris with magnus bane, who clearly had a thing for me. i've never had a real relationship before. i've never been in love. and now here i was. walking down a street in the city of love with magnus. something was bound to happen here. and i was excited for whatever that was.

++

-magnus-

the restaurant was beautiful. i've never been here, but i've heard so much about it from catarina, who has been here many times. when we walked in, the hostess greeted us and sat us down outside where we could easily see the eiffel tower right across the water. i ran across the table to alexander's side and seated him.

"thank you." he smiled.

"you're very welcome, alexander."

there was a silence as we were both admiring the view of the eiffel tower.

"by the angel." he said in a very soft voice. "it's beautiful. i've never seen anything like it in real life before."

"it's really stunning. i can take you here anytime you want, alexander. let me show you the world. london, rome, tuscany, dublin, tokyo, hong kong. wherever you want to go, alexander, i'll take you there."

he smiled the most beautiful smile at me. his eyes were sparkling. he looked amazing. i tried so hard to hold myself back from telling him how stunning he looks.

we got our food fairly quickly and it didn't take either of us too long to eat it.

"so, do you come here often?" he asked me.

"i try to come as much as i can, but it's called the city of love. it's the most romantic city in the world. i haven't been very romantic lately."

he put his head down. i could tell this subject bothered him.

"alexander. if you don't want to talk about this, we don't have to. i can tell how much this bothers you."

"it's fine. it doesn't bother me. you're immortal. you've probably been with a lot of people. unlike me, who hasn't been with anyone before."

"wait, you seriously haven't been with anyone before?"

"nope. but that's fine."

"alexander."

"seriously. it's fine. we also don't need to talk about your exes, either."

"well, if you want to know about them, i'll tell you. i don't mind."

"okay. how many people have you been with?"

"alexander." he gave me a look that told me he was serious. "okay fine. 17,000."

his eyes opened wide in surprise. "17,000? are you serious???"

i sighed and put my head down.

"i'm sorry. i'm not mad. i'm just surprised."

"it was all a long time ago. those relationships are all in the past. you are in the present. please understand that. you are the only person in my life right now. okay?"

"yeah. sure. okay."

++

-alec-

after we got out of the restaurant, he took me to a bench facing the water and the eiffel tower. i stared straight out onto the water.

"alexander. please say something." he said.

"what's there to say? you have your past and i have mine. it's okay. we're two completely different people. and there's nothing that can change that. and i'm okay with it. seriously."

i looked at him and smiled. he was still looking at me like he's ashamed of his past.

i cupped his face into my palm. "magnus. seriously. i'm okay with it. i promise."

he still looked like he didn't believe me. i took a deep breath and thought about what izzy said for one last time. i was done pretending. i was in the city of love with magnus and we were at by far the most romantic spot in the world. there was nothing stopping me from doing what i've been wanting to do since i met him. i leaned into him and before i knew it, my lips were on his and i could feel the warmth of his breath. i felt him relax and lean into it. it started out kind of soft and then it progressed. we stopped before it could get to be too much too quickly. we were both breathing really heavily.

"woah. you certainly know how to make a statement, alexander." we both smiled.

magnus opened up a portal right next to us. "let's get out of here. we can always come back anytime."

"yes. let's go home."

he reached his hand out to me and i grabbed it, following him into the portal.


	6. 6

-alec-

when we got back to magnus' apartment, i got a call from izzy.

"i'm sorry. i have to go." i said to magnus.

"it's alright, alexander. go fight your demons, shadowhunter."

i gave him a kiss on the cheek and left.

"so, how was your first date with magnus?"

"honestly, perfect."

"aw yay! alright tell me everything." she was smiling.

"okay so he took me to paris where we ate at this really fancy restaurant and then we just enjoyed the view."

"that's it? c'mon alec. we both know that's not all that happened."

i sighed. "okay fine. we also talked about our exes."

"uh oh."

"yeah."

"so then how did that go?"

"well that part went terrible. what with me having no exes and him having 17,000 exes."

"17,000???"

"yeah. that was exactly my reaction too."

she sighed. "so then what happened after that?"

"we went to a bench in front the water and the eiffel tower."

"and?"

"i convinced him that he has nothing to worry about and that i'm not mad about his past."

"and how did you do that?"

"i kissed him."

she gasped and smiled the biggest smile i've ever seen on her.

i smirked.

"ALEC!!!"

"what?"

"aw i'm so proud of you, big brother." she gave me a big hug. she backed away as if she just touched a monster. "wait."

"what is it, iz?"

"what about mom?"

"what about her?"

"you know she's gonna be pissed. she wants to keep the lightwood name alive. they're both probably gonna expect you to marry a shadowhunter woman."

"yeah, well i don't care."

"alec."

"izzy. i don't need them to tell me how to live. i love magnus. they're just gonna have to deal with that."

she smiled. "alec. i could not be more proud of you."

++

when i woke up, i looked at my phone and saw that i got a text from magnus.

magnus

alec

hello alexander.

hey magnus.

i was just thinking about how much i loved our date last night.

i smiled.

yeah me too.

would you like to come over for a drink tonight?

i would love to. what time?

whatever time is good for you, alexander.

okay. i'll be there at 8.

perfect. see you then.

see you then.

++

as soon as i put my phone down, i heard jace yelling for me. i rolled my eyes and went to the weapons room. i knew where he was and where we were going.

"there's a greater demon somewhere in manhattan." he said to me as i walked into the room. he was getting his seraph blades ready for battle.

"manhattan? what is it doing there?" i asked him. i didn't see izzy or clary around anywhere.

"word is that valentine sent it there. probably to draw us out to get into the institute. that's why you and i are going out there to fight it while izzy and clary stay back and protect the institute from valentine. we're not letting him in here. he's a shadowhunter, so he can get in, but we won't let him, though. when we get there, we're gonna-"

i cut him off. "-i know what to do, jace. let's go." i said as i grabbed my bow and quiver and walked out of the weapons room, rolling my eyes.

he called out after me before i could get out of the institute. "alec, wait!"

i rolled my eyes again as i turned around. "what?"

"what's going on with you?"

"nothing."

"no, tell me."

i just stared down at him.

"alec, i'm not letting you go out there if you won't talk to me. we both have to have our heads in the game in order to defeat this greater demon. it's a small one, but it still won't be easy, though. so, what's wrong?"

"you. you're always the one telling me what to do. even izzy and clary, too. i'm done living in your shadow, jace. i do what i want. you're not the leader anymore. i'm done." i walked out.

when we got to where the greater demon was after a long trip without talking, the demon came right after us. i shot it with an arrow before it could get either of us. it started to create a small hole in its stomach, where black ichor dripped onto us from. we both screamed from the burn. it took us a while to finally defeat it, jace and i both taking turns on hitting it, but i was the one to kill it with an arrow. immediately after i killed it, we both used iratzes to heal ourselves.

"you good?" i asked him.

"yeah, you?"

"yeah."

"nice job."

"thanks."

"you're welcome."

we were both almost out of breath and energy.

"let's get back. we have to get ready, anyways."

that got my attention. "ready? for what?"

"the party for the new head of the institute? you didn't know about that?"

"uh...no?"

"yeah. inquisitor herondale is coming in from idris and she's gonna be the new head of the institute here."

shit. magnus.

"oh. okay."

"what do you say we get back?"

i sighed. "yeah."

when we got back to the institute, i called magnus.

he answered on the first ring.

"hello alexander. to what do i owe the pleasure?"

"hey magnus. um...i can't make it tonight. we have a party for the new head of the institute tonight."

there was a moment of silence.

"magnus? you still there?"

"yes, of course."

"i'm sorry."

"it's alright, alexander. i understand."

"wait. magnus."

"yes?"

"would you like to come with me?"

"alexander. i would love to, but i thought it was only for shadowhunters, though."

"not necessarily. i'm allowed to have a plus one, but it doesn't have to be a shadowhunter, though."

"alright, then. i would love to come, alexander."

i smiled. "awesome."

"what time?"

"it doesn't matter. the party starts at 7."

"alright. i'll be there at 7."

"perfect. i'll see you then."

"i'll see you then, alexander."

i hung up, still smiling. izzy came up to me and smiled. "magnus?"

"yeah."

"BY THE ANGEL! ALEC, DID YOU INVITE HIM TO THE PARTY TONIGHT??"

"yeah, why? is there a problem with that?"

"WHAT?? NO, OF COURSE NOT! YAY I'M SO EXCITED!!"

"yeah me too." my smile got bigger.

"wait, alec." she lost her smile. so did i. "mom and dad will kill you. you know they will."

"izzy. you know i don't care about that."

she sighed. "i know. i just don't want to see you get hurt."

"iz. i'll be fine. trust me. i can handle them. also, i'll be with magnus. i feel safe with him. i feel comfortable with him." i smirked.

"well, then that's all i need to hear." she smiled at me and walked away.

just then, jace walked up to me. "hey alec. nice job back there."

"thanks. you too."

"look, alec, i'm sorry."

"for what?"

"for always being the leader. for always putting you in my shadow. i promise, i never mean to do that. it's just a habit."

"what, only caring about yourself?"

"alec, cmon. that's not fair. you're my parabatai. we're closer than blood. we're both physically and emotionally connected. you're also my brother."

i didn't say anything.

"alec. look, i know you're mad at me. and you have every right to be. i just want you to know that i love you. okay? we're about as close as we can get, but i also feel like we're really far away from each other. please, alec. forgive me."

"okay. fine. i forgive you. promise me you'll change?"

"i promise. you know you can count on me, alec."

"yeah, i know."

we both smiled and walked towards izzy and clary, who were getting ready for the party.

++

-izzy-

"okay, you guys know that i love parties, but this one is really unnecessary. i mean, i know that inquisitor herondale is coming to the institute and i know that she's like shadowhunter royalty, and i also know that it's tradition to go to these things, but this is honestly just a huge waste of my time. i prefer parties for teenagers and young adults. preferably magnus' parties. now those are awesome. so much more worth my time." i said to everyone as i finished putting on my bright red lipstick. everyone else just giggled. just then, my mother came in. "mother."

"isabelle. i see your interest in fashion hasn't changed." she scanned my outfit, which was a tight, bright red dress that went all the way down to my knees. it also had a v-neck shape on my chest.

"you have never approved of my fashion choices."

"yes, you're very right. maybe you should start listening to me for a change."

"for once, can you at least be nice to me about my fashion?" i yelled at her. immediately, i realized what i had done. she looked shocked that i had just yelled at her. i put my head down. "i'm sorry, mother. i didn't mean to-"

she cut me off. "-oh, i know exactly what you meant, isabelle. you will never change, will you?" a tear dripped down my face. she turned toward my brothers. "boys, meet me in the party room in five minutes." she turned toward clary. "clarissa, you can meet us in there whenever my daughter is ready." she rolled her eyes and started walking out the door. "however long that will be." she said under her breath.

the boys looked back at me with apologetic eyes before they both walked out to follow our mom.

clary looked over at me. "iz. are you okay?" i sat down on the bed and looked down again. "she doesn't really like you, does she?"

i sighed. "nope. she never has. alec was always her favorite growing up. then when we took jace in, it was him. she's always hated me. for everything. my fashion choices, my fighting skills, my taste in boys, everything."

"you have a boyfriend now, don't you?"

"yeah. meliorn."

"so then why doesn't she like him?"

"because he's a seelie. because he's a downworlder."

"but alec is dating a downworlder, too, though."

"exactly. she doesn't like him, either. she also doesn't like the fact that alec is gay. both of our parents have always wanted us to marry shadowhunters and to also marry someone of the opposite sex as us. especially alec because she wants him to keep the lightwood name alive and that's the only way. or at least that's what they think."

she sighed as she sat down next to me and put a hand on my shoulder. "hey. iz."

i was already crying. i stopped for a second and looked up at her. "what?"

"do what makes you happy. you don't always have to listen to your parents. show them that it makes you happy. if you wanna date meliorn, then you do that. stand up for yourself. that's the only way you'll ever be happy. both you and alec. okay? will you promise me that?"

i smiled. "yeah. i promise. thanks, clary."

"of course. i mean, what are best friends for, right? now, go and grab your whip and your jewelry and let's go into that party and kill all of those bitches. let's show them what we're made of. girl power. right?"

she stood up and smiled as she held out a hand to me. i took it and stood up, too. i smiled. "yes. girl power." i grabbed my whip and my jewelry and we went over to the party room.

++

-magnus-

when we walked into the party, everyone immediately stopped talking and stared at us. i knew why, too.

"alexander, you shouldn't have brought me here. they're all staring at me because i'm a warlock at a shadowhunter party."

he didn't even stop. he just kept walking and acting like nothing was wrong. "magnus. they're not staring at you because you're a warlock. they're staring at you because you're so damn beautiful." he smiled at me. he looked at me like i was a million dollars.

i blushed. "alexander."

he didn't say anything. he just went to the bar and got us both cocktails. he held his up to mine. "to us."

"to us." i said back as we clanked our glasses together and drank from them.

all of a sudden, i heard maryse stomping her way over towards us. "alec. i need to talk to you." she looked over towards me. "privately." she looked back over at alec. he didn't move. "now, alec!"

he started to walk away when i stopped him. "it's okay, alexander. i'll go talk to isabelle." i walked away.

++

-alec-

"what is it, mother?"

"what were you thinking, bringing that warlock here?" she said 'warlock' as if it actually physically pained her to say it.

"i brought him because he's my boyfriend. and if you have a problem with that, then i suggest you deal with it."

"alec, you were way out of line bringing a downworlder to a shadowhunter party." she said 'downworlder' just like how she said 'warlock'.

"there's no rule against bringing downworlders to shadowhunter parties."

"alec, he's not allowed to be here."

"if you kick him out, then i'm leaving, too. if you want me to stay, then he stays. i wanted him to come because he's the only person here who actually sees me as i am. besides izzy."

"but jace-"

"-jace only sees me as his little pet. i've always lived in his shadow and i'm done."

"alec. you know that both your father and i love you. and izzy-"

"-if you guys really loved us, then you would let her date meliorn and you wouldn't be trying to stop me from dating magnus. he makes me happy. and we're not going away. there's nothing you can do about it, so don't try anything. all you care about is yourself. both of you. try caring about your children for once. you don't even want jace in our family. newsflash, mother, he is. and he's not leaving. neither is magnus. and i'll make sure meliorn doesn't, either." i walked towards magnus after that.

magnus was talking to izzy. when i got there, izzy started to walk away. "i'll leave you two alone. i just saw clary and jace walk in." she smiled as she walked towards clary and jace.

as soon as izzy was gone, i grabbed magnus by the lapels and kissed him in front of everyone in the room. i didn't care. as soon as i stopped, magnus smiled. "woah. big step."

"yeah. i'm done waiting. i needed everyone to know that i'm dating you." he smiled at me when i said that. "that i'm in love with you."

his smile dropped from his face. "what?"

i pulled him out of the room. "magnus, i love you. i'm done pretending. when my mother was talking shit about you to me, i realized that i'm in love with you. like really in love with you. magnus, there's no one in the world who understands me as much as you do. who treats me like you do. and i've never felt this way about anyone before. but magnus, you've really changed something in me. made me realize who i really am. and i honestly can't thank you enough for that."

he was speechless. i kissed him again. he finally spoke. "i love you, too, alexander." he kissed me back. we would've gone too far too early if izzy hadn't cleared her throat and stopped us.

she smiled. "sorry for interrupting, but mom wants you guys back in there. she's about to introduce inquisitor herondale."

we followed her back into the party.


End file.
